Analysis of Public Speaking - Anxiety and Proposals

What are the biggest obstacles to happiness in the western world? I have not performed a detailed analysis, but I believe that different forms of anxiety are high up on the list, stemming from worries about the future, one's career or family, or direct forms of fear. Therefore, if we want to increase happiness, how can we reduce people's anxiety levels? Let's examine the root causes of public speaking anxiety one by one:

1. Belief That Public Speaking is Stressful

This is a self-fulfilling prophesy: we believe public speaking is stressful, and therefore it actually becomes stressful. It is important to understand that this is our mind messing with us. Speaking in public is not inherently stressful. When you were a kid, you didn't hesitate to speak in front of others. Only later in life do we develop this fear, and as adults we believe it is an integral part of public speaking. Also, keep in mind that many people have succeeded in managing their fear of public speaking, so you can as well. Always remember (repeat after me): speaking in public is not inherently stressful.

2. Fearing the Fear

This is a nasty, reinforcing effect triggered by our belief that speaking in public is stressful: we start to fear the fear itself, causing a spiral of fear that leads to very high anxiety levels. What can we do to prevent this vicious cycle? Here are some proposals:

Remember that speaking in public is not inherently stressful (see Section 1.)

Don't fight the fear

3. Pressure on Yourself to Succeed

If putting pressure on ourselves increases anxiety levels, why do we do it? There seem to be three main reasons:

3.1. Thinking "It's All About Me"

To put it succinctly: no, it's not about you. It's about contributing value to the audience, mainly by teaching audience members something they didn't know before. Instead of focusing on yourself, focus on the audience and especially on the message you want to get across. This is what the audience cares about - not you.

3.2. Belief That You Have to be Perfect or Brilliant to Succeed

You don't have to be perfect or brilliant to succeed. Your task is merely to add bit of value to the audience. If you can convey a couple of key messages that are interesting and/or new to the audience, you've already succeeded. Therefore, get the idea out of your head that you have to be perfect to succeed. Perfectionism will make you go crazy. The belief that one has to be perfect may emerge in various ways:

a) Belief that you cannot make any mistakes
b) Belief that you have to give your audience every detail
c) Belief that everybody in the audience has to approve

3.3. Thinking You Are the Only One with This Problem

Believing that you are the only person with public speaking anxiety may reinforce the problem. You may mistakenly believe that while all others have succeeded, you are the last stupid individual still struggling to overcome the problem. Of course, this is not true. Public speaking anxiety is often identified as people's greatest fear, so don't think you are alone - you certainly are not.

4. Not Being Yourself

As a result of putting pressure on yourself, you may try to mimic other people whom you consider to be successful (or your abstract and vague idea of how a good public speaker behaves and feels), thereby pretending to be somebody you are not.

Unfortunately, this:

• Further increases anxiety levels
• Is an unauthentic, uncomfortable feeling
• Distracts from the message you want to convey, and
• Is spotted by the audience in about 100% of the time

So be yourself and tell the audience naturally whatever you have to say. Your listeners will thank you for it.

5. Preparing Too Much and in the Wrong Way

This is a tricky one. Preparation is good, isn't it?

In my experience, preparation is very important to the extent that it helps you add value, (e.g. allowing you to convey information clearly and helping you indentify any inconsistencies in your message). The best way to prepare may be to rehearse the presentation on your own while imagining the audience in front of you (videotaping yourself may be a good idea) or to practice your presentation in front of some of friends who will provide feedback.

6. Lack of Purpose / No Value to Contribute / Nothing to Say

Unless you are a politician, you will always feel uncomfortable if you don't have a message to convey. Without a message, facing hundreds of eyes that are eager for knowledge can indeed be an uncomfortable situation. Therefore, make sure you have good, well-thought-out messages to convey, and you'll be fine.

7. Belief that Something Bad Will Happen

Sometimes our imagination and creativity can harm us. When thinking about speaking in public, many overblown and unrealistic thoughts come to mind. What if I pass out from exhaustion? What if I forget everything I intended to say and am left standing alone, totally speechless?

The question is: how can we avoid going crazy?

• Remind yourself that your fears are completely overblown.
• Apply this mindset: "everything that happens can be used to my advantage."
• Do NLP exercises

Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) provides an interesting set of techniques to change our learned perceptions.

8. Belief that the Audience Does Not Want You to Succeed

Our relationship with the audience is another key point. As long as you regard your audience as your enemy (which is almost never justified) you will put unnecessary pressure on yourself. In reality, your audience members want you to succeed and deliver the information that interests them. A slip of the tongue or a mistake of any kind might seem a big deal to you, but it's not that important for the audience. Your listeners are just interested in learning something new.

There are several ways to gain practice:

• Join Toastmasters
• Seek public speaking opportunities
• Start slowly if required, but start!

Dealing Directly With the Symptoms of Public Speaking Anxiety

The approaches described above try to tackle the root causes of the problem, which is necessary for a long-term solution. However, we can also deal with the symptoms in the short term.5 Most of these techniques aim to help you feel calmer and more relaxed:

• Learn relaxation techniques / deep breathing
• Do workouts before the event
• Avoid caffeine
• Consume relaxing food / drinks
• Do other things that help you to relax

Key takeaways:

1. Speaking in public is not inherently stressful.
2. Don't fear the fear. Don't fight it.
3. Don't put pressure on yourself to succeed:

- It's not about you.
- You don't have to be perfect or brilliant to succeed.
- You are not the only one with this problem.

4. Be yourself.
5. Don't over-prepare or prepare in too much detail, but do rehearse if possible.
6. Make sure you have a message to share. Focus on your audience and on the message itself during your presentation.
7. Don't believe something bad will happen.
8. Don't think your audience does not want you to succeed.
9. Get practice to see firsthand that all the points above are true.

A final thought: This post was written in an effort to reduce an uncomfortable feeling (i.e., reduce "unhappiness"), but it could just as well have been written to tap a new source of happiness: many speakers say that speaking in front of others while feeling relaxed and engaged is a fantastic feeling they will never forget. The rewards of overcoming public speaking anxiety are very, very high!

I sincerely hope this advice helps you. For more advice please read here how to reduce your fear of public speaking.